If you still don't do what you love and don't follow your dream, then it's time to start doing it. A practical guide to realizing your potential on the road to success.
Freedom is wonderful. But it is also painful because it requires us to set our own goals. Has it ever happened to you that you read an article on how to achieve goals and feel confused because do not understand, but what exactly do you want? You literally have no idea what to do with your life?
If you are still not doing what you love and not going after your dream, fasten your seat belts, because these 7 exercises will be a real breakthrough for you.
Dreaming is a sequel to Barbara Sher's bestseller Dreaming Isn't Bad. It provides practical advice and exercises on how to overcome self-criticism, overcome negative attitudes, get off the beaten path, trust your desires, re-believe in long-forgotten goals, define your talents, find enthusiasm and, finally, find your way in life.
So let's see why you don't know what you want. And then we'll try to do something about it.
1. Throw away "Broken Compasses"
Learn. Get married. Earn money. Grow up the career ladder. Have children. Buy a house …
Other people's expectations often live in our head. Silent installations. Broken compasses.
The desires of the family and those closest to us give meaning - good or bad - to all our activities. Even if we think we don't care.
Take a blank sheet of paper and write down the names of all family members and people close to you. That is, list everyone who was important to you in childhood and adolescence: teachers, coaches, neighbors, cousins, older friends. Under each name, write down what kind of life this person wanted for you. If you are like most people, you will see these expectations take an intricate twist: there are many, and some may be completely opposite.
These expectations put us in an obviously impossible situation, tying us hand and foot.
Is there a mindset on this list to realize your unique potential? Who insisted that you seek your own, original self, whatever the cost? Very few people will see such a wish on their list.
Leave broken compasses. You should not live up to someone's expectations, but do what makes your heart sing.
2. Live with a goal for an hour
For the next hour, you will be actively engaged in moving towards your goal. Set a timer for an hour and devote yourself to this goal. And only when you hear the signal can you stop.
“Dedicating yourself” in our case means that we must stop the discussion. Discard all “ifs”. Stop planning! The future is determined!
What is your nearest ambitious goal? Do comedy shows, or buy an island, go remote work, or join a kibbutz? What are the first steps to be taken in this direction? Call, agree, make, buy, promise. Actively. Right now.
3. Meet Your Monstrous Internal Resistance
And if working on the goal from the previous exercise caused you anxiety, great! Your resistance is ready to go on stage. Every time you get enthusiastic, you stop yourself - and do it in the language of negativity: “Stupid. Useless".
Take a piece of paper with a pen or a tape recorder - whichever is more convenient for you - and write down what the voice of resistance says. This little mischievous creature thinks it is protecting you, doing its best to take your enthusiasm away when it senses danger - and it senses danger every time you reach for what you want. It will try to block the road, causing feelings of guilt, shame, inadequacy, or hopelessness. But behind his every word lies the secret of liberation.
4. Use These Five Ideas To Find Yourself
- Find autobiographies of famous people who have been doing what you do. And the biographies of people who were doing something completely different from what you are.
- Learn something new. What is good - to control a balloon, or to breed goldfish, or find 10 ways to prove the Pythagorean theorem, or collect ancient masks. The part of the brain that you have exploited too often will rest while the other, which was practically inactive, continues to work.
- Just trust your instinct. Move on to anything but interesting for you, and get away from everything boring - even if you don't know why it is interesting or boring! Like a flower that turns in the wake of the sun, you will begin to grow in the direction of things that interest you.
- Assign yourself a work goal. A “work goal” is a goal that can change. Roughly like the working title of a movie or book. The work is in progress, and the title is preliminary, conditional, which can be changed when you are finished. In the case of a career, this also works. This is how happy accidents happen.
- Come up with a perfect family. A family in which you would be supported and understood from the very birth. Consider in detail how energetically each family member is supporting you. Allowing yourself to see what your married life could be will help you feel differently about yourself.
5. Act as if you are very brave and will never fail
Imagine two things. First, that you are a very brave person and nothing stops you. This fantasy is within your reach. And second, imagine that you will never fail.
What would you do if you had the courage and knew for sure that you would be successful?
Write your answers on paper. It is important.
6. Perfect day
Everyone has heard of Ideal Day. Do this exercise again, but this time pay attention to 2 points.
- Key scene. You already know what your dream is. Now close your eyes and imagine your favorite moment in your fantasy. What exactly is going to happen? What is the key scene in the film about your life? When you enjoy your fantasy, open your eyes. Describe what you saw in a few words.
- We enjoy our success. Once you've figured out what to do, imagine how you will rest and relax in your ideal life? Enjoy this fantasy rest for at least five minutes.
7. Make a 95 year plan
You need to start from the beginning of life and treat the past years as if you deliberately planned them - you were born, at the age of seven you went to school, at twenty you moved to Moscow. Continue to the present, and then move on to the future: at 57 you went to Antarctica, at 65 you began to plant orchids and wrote a great novel, at 85 you got married again. Don't stop until you're 95!
Take a few sheets of paper and divide them into four columns:
- Age. In it, write down the numbers 5, 10, 15, 20 and so on, up to 95 years. You can split these intervals into smaller ones.
- Main event. It means being born, going to school, moving - and whatever happens or may happen in the future - whatever you think is important.
- What I've learned. Write down the most important thing you have learned or will learn at each age.
- The most amazing thing I've seen. You may not remember the past perfectly, but trust the impulse: it will not let you go far from the truth.
When you get to the future, you have to let your imagination run free, but try and do it. It's worth it. After completing the exercise, write down below what this imaginary path taught you at ninety-five years of age in relation to the meaning of life.
Once you begin to grope your way, you are at the forefront of a major historical change. A true genius lives within you - one of a kind, inquisitive, with great potential. As soon as you go for your dream, you will awaken and everything will be filled with meaning.