2023 Author: Katelyn Chandter | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-05-21 13:08
The educational system is very strange and not at all like real life. That is why many excellent students cannot find themselves in life, and those with poor students become the kings of life. A few interesting thoughts for self-development. “One of the simplest and most accessible to every person is three-minute meditation. During the first minute, you need to listen to your breathing, the second minute is “looking” at your own thoughts (all without exception - both positive and negative, but without evaluating them), and the third minute is a step of consciousness outside yourself in order to consider everything what is happening in the most abstract way”, is an idea from the book“Mindfulness”. We have collected for you on cards several interesting thoughts from books on self-development.
The big eight
The first and most important quality that unites everyone is love for their work. The writer Stephen King, for example, admits that although he made "a lot of money with his prose," he nevertheless did not put a single word on paper just because of the money. It's not enough to choose what you like. We still need to start practicing it. All outstanding people have confirmed that they are very hardworking. And, of course, there is no talk of a "4-hour working" week. Those who succeed work 14-16 hours a day. Tennis player Serena Williams says that while preparing for matches and tournaments, she cannot think about anything other than sports. “I constantly think about how I will behave, my opponents. I think about it before going to bed and when I wake up in the morning,”says Serena. Nicole Kidman says: “Every time I get a lead role, I start running in horror after the director and begging him to take on the role of another actress. I even write a list of those who can cope with the role better than me. But then I pull myself together and calm down. " Dealing with your doubts and fears is another key leadership skill. Very often we ask other people to rate ourselves and our talents, many of whom are considered recognized experts. But people, as you know, tend to be wrong. For example, before the novel "Harry Potter" was published, J. K. Rowling was turned down by 12 publishers. She was given consent only by the 13th publishing house to which she sent her book. If not for her tenacity, the world never saw her romance. Another important element of success is creativity. For example, media mogul Ted Turner invented round-the-clock news broadcasting and this is how it was. “I was sitting at home at night and suddenly asked myself: 'What about those who want to watch the news at night?' This is how CNN24 was born. " Successful people first create something in their head, and then they implement it in life. The right people never stop working on themselves. This is how the assistant coach of the Chicago Bulls John Bach said about basketball player Michael Jordan: "Michael had a rare ability: being already a genius, he worked on himself every day to become even a little brighter." You must be able to serve people and be in "giving." Every outstanding leader serves people and puts them at the head of their business, projects, and so on. As General Electric CEO Jack Welch once said, "We want to build a company with customers at the center." Those who try to create true value for people always win.
On the limit
You can work on your habits in three steps. The first step is to make a list of the habits you already have. Think back to both good and bad habits. Then decide which habits you want to cross out and which ones you want to add to your life. And plan what you will do to make a difference. It's all about the state of mind, or mental preparation. It is closely related to the result that you get in the end. If before each business meeting we prepared for it and clearly chose the position that we want to take on it, then the outcome would be completely different. In order to develop awareness and enter the right state of mind, all you need to do is ask yourself the right questions as you go through the day. It doesn't matter how much you love your job. Experts recognize that being effective starts with being able to stop in the middle of this heap of things, set aside a few minutes and ask yourself, "Where am I going?" Yes, it’s not easy to stop doing what you did, but it’s worth it. Stop all processes and assess the situation. Collect all the pieces of the puzzle and review the tasks. Once you organize all the information, add it to the calendar. You must create a vision of your business and projects for the near future that will help you move faster. Probably the biggest problem of modern man is that we have completely forgotten how to rest. We often work at work, and during vacations, vacations, and weekends. It turns out that our brain and body are always in a tense state. We cannot afford to rest fully even for one day. Give yourself a Happy Day. This is the day when only positive thoughts should be in your head. You will work all day to create positive self-talk. The challenge of the day is to show how much the way of thinking affects everything that happens to you. Every time a negative thought arises in your head, block it. Every time you feel that your thoughts are poisoning you, change them to constructive ones. As Winston Churchill said: "A pessimist sees difficulty in any opportunity, an optimist sees an opportunity in any difficulty." At the end of the week, take some time to write down the conclusions this week has left behind. What have you learned? What have you understood? How has your life changed? What new have you learned about yourself? What new qualities have you discovered? What is really important to you? What difficulties have you encountered? In the middle of the day, you should reward yourself with a special reward or gift. And in the evening go to dinner with friends or your second half and talk about all the impressions of Hell Week.
It turns out that the speed of information processing decreases starting from the age of 20. Over the years, a person needs more and more time to navigate the situation. A child is born with a rather small brain: it weighs about 300-400 grams, and boys have more "thinking". By the end of the first year of life, the weight of the brain doubles (every day the brain adds about 1 gram!), By the age of three it triples, and by the age of 21 it acquires a standard weight. Interestingly, as a person gets older and older, the weight and volume of the brain decreases. From about 20-21 to 50 years, the volume and weight of our "think tank" remains unchanged. But 50 years is the boundary beyond which the possessions of old age begin. From this age on, the brain begins to gradually shrink. Memory is a very fragile thing. There are scientific theories that claim that memory has a limited amount: you cannot fill it indefinitely, something will inevitably be erased. One scientist-ichthyologist, who at a respectable age became the dean of the faculty, once said: "When I remember the name of a new student, I forget the names of two species of fish." Perhaps this is one of the clearest illustrations of such theories. Get ready, surprise: memory declines from age 20. Again this figure! Research confirms that after twenty, the memory curve begins to gradually decline. Of course, in everyday life, you are unlikely to notice this. Memory is noticeably impaired at the age of 60 to 75 years. However, not many people get involved in clinical disorders. Successful aging is a set of measures that will help you stay fit, mentally and physically, despite age. Scientists are now working on a plan for “aging successfully”. It remains to wait quite a bit. Who knows, maybe our generation will be the first to stop old age.
You can do more than you think
A person who has developed musical intelligence loves music very much. He distinguishes and captures rhythm, melody and musical keys. He hears when the musicians play out of tune, and understands from which notes and chords the song is composed and how the instruments sound. In many cultures, music is ubiquitous in everyday life. In Hungary, children and adolescents are taught music at school. Lessons are held every day. In Japan, children as young as three are sent to learn to play the violin or piano by the Suzuki Method. Senegalese grios - "singing about the news" - still bring the news to the people and are the custodians of local history. Here are some tips from Thomas Armstrong for a teenager to develop musical abilities and enjoy them to the fullest: Listen to music of a variety of styles. Let him get into the habit of listening to the radio (blues, jazz, classical, country, pop, rap, gospel). And let him be in no hurry to switch the wave if he thinks that he does not like any of the styles at all. After listening to one or two compositions, it may turn out that even the music that he usually does not listen to will be to his liking. You can also listen to music from different countries and peoples. Irish, Mexican, Indian, Chinese - whatever interests him. There are radio stations broadcasting ethnic music. On the Internet, you can find and listen to music from all over the world. Start a family tradition - sing your favorite songs together and learn new ones. Singing together is so much fun! Another option: find a set of simple percussion instruments (drum, castanets, cymbals, tambourine) and play along with your favorite music. Listen to music together. Have the child try to distinguish between melody, rhythm, tonality, sound of instruments and their timbre. Discuss what you heard with your child. Did he manage to catch the musical drawing? Do you like the performance in general? What in this composition resonates with him? Did he hear the same thing as you? Let your child learn to pay attention to the music around him. To begin with, within a few minutes you can listen to the sounds of nature and the world around you - cars, people, city life. Then compose your own musical composition for any instrument - piano, guitar.
When you want to get things done, whether it's a promotion or losing 37 extra pounds, it's important to have the right strategy. It is necessary to develop a plan, break it down into small segments and gradually, taking small steps in the right direction, get your way. And do not forget to record the result. This is where daily questions come to the rescue. Every day, you should ask yourself questions like "Did I do my best to _______." This simplest method can completely change your life. And below we will tell you why. Behavioral economists call daily questions the "self-restraint method." Such questions force us to formulate what we really want to change in our life. Making a list of goals can be the starting point from which we first begin to understand what we are doing wrong, to recognize the possibility of change, or the chance to get better. "Internal" - when we want to do something just like that, because we like it, for example, to read a book that we were not asked in the lesson, because we are interested in the topic. People who get up early to run 10 km for the sheer pleasure of physical effort have a high level of intrinsic motivation. "Extrinsic" motivation refers to an extrinsic benefit, such as the approval of others or avoidance of punishment. When we receive an education, we are bombarded with many external motivators: grades, awards, scholarships, parental pressure, future resume, admission to prestigious educational institutions. Our extrinsic motivation is only fragile when we achieve all of this, and then we wonder why it did not bring us the happiness we hoped for. Daily questions neutralize the nemesis of behavior change: impatience. Whether our goal is a flat stomach or a new reputation, we want to see results now, not someday. We see the distance between the effort that needs to be made today and the reward that we will receive in the uncertain future, and our enthusiasm evaporates. We yearn for immediate rewards, and we are annoyed at the prospect of long efforts. Think about what you want to change in your life. What goal do you want to achieve? How can you come to this result? Work out a plan to help you take the first and next steps. Then take action. And remember to ask yourself questions like “Did I do my best to _______” every day. For example, to stick to a diet / improve your cooking skills / develop intellectually. Your list of daily questions may include 5-6 items on which you track the result. And, as we have already seen, the answers to these questions will help you get your way.
How to get things in order
There is one question that helps build a multi-million dollar corporation and give birth to an empire. The question is, "What's my next step?" When you ask yourself this question, your vision of the processes becomes more global, and you stop doing unnecessary actions. Scientists have figured out that multitasking doesn't exist. Of course, you can iron your shirt and talk on the phone with an uninteresting interlocutor. But when it comes to performing tasks at work that require high concentration, then you can forget about multitasking. That is why one of the main rules of success is this: the fastest way to do all the planned things is to do them consistently. Things that we keep in mind are like open programs on a computer. They constantly take on some of our energy, and we cannot concentrate. If you want to increase your efficiency several times, then write down on paper all the tasks that concern you right now. Next to each task, write the due date. After you do this, these "hanging" tasks will stop "buzzing" in your head and you are guaranteed to feel better. A separate story is unfulfilled promises to oneself. Very often we make promises to ourselves from the series “We need to learn Chinese”, “Start running on Monday”. There is a technique called "Trash". You need to imagine in the form of a huge dump all the promises that you made to yourself. And then imagine how you burn or destroy this landfill. If the first time your success is influenced by the quality of your product, marketing, investments, etc., then later connections come to the fore. They say that Bill Clinton, long before he became president of the United States, came to events with a notebook and pen. He wrote down the names and occupations of everyone he came across.
Why didn't anyone tell me this at 20?
The school system itself is very strange and not at all like real life. In school tests, there is always only one correct answer. In class, we must sit quietly and look at the teacher. Desks are nailed to the floor, and any manifestation of individuality is punished. In life, everything is completely different. There can be many answers to the same question. And you can choose any! In this case, you can select all or not select anything. There are no teachers who need to prove something. You have complete freedom of choice. That is why many excellent students cannot find themselves in life - they are too “correct”. Losers become the kings of life, because they are used to a non-standard approach. " “Luck is a fiction. The harder you work, the luckier you become. " Even if you don't believe in yourself, there is still an immutable law when quantity turns into quality. The more you work on something, the more you get. Remember that there are no rules at either 20 or 40 years old. The only thing that limits us is the scope of our brain. A solution can be found for any problem. Any problem can be turned into an opportunity. The main thing is to look at the problem from the right angle. Every day life gives us thousands of options in order to build our real life. She gives us people who can help us. One Tina had a story when she had a very bad knee and the man whom she accidentally saw on the street and gave a lift in her car turned out to be an orthopedic doctor. During the time they were driving, he recognized the true causes of knee pain and advised remedies that would help.
One of the properties of the brain is that negative thoughts in it, figuratively speaking, trample their paths and love to walk the beaten paths. Like streams that habitually run along their channels. When at least one negative thought appears, the brain recalls similar situations - and now many streams merge into a river called a bad mood. Any insignificant moment, for example, the impoliteness of the conductor, can cause a chain reaction of unpleasant thoughts, memories and emotions. As a result, a good morning mood can not only deteriorate, but also turn into prolonged stress and even physical illness. Imagine, it's spring around, colleagues are smiling, today is payday - and you are gloomy as a cloud. And even the conductor had already fled from memory, but the bad mood remained. This is one of the most common phenomena: the brain occupied with negative thoughts distorts reality and aggravates unpleasant situations - even the most fleeting and essentially not worthy of attention. Moreover, paying increased attention to our tiredness or sadness, we do not solve the problem, but only intensify it. This is proven by serious research. This is the automation of the brain, its habits. But these mechanisms can be reconfigured to your advantage. One of the simplest and most accessible to everyone is three-minute meditation. During the first minute, you need to listen to your breathing, the second minute is "looking" at your own thoughts (all without exception - both positive and negative, but without evaluating them), and the third minute is a step of consciousness outside yourself in order to consider everything what is happening is as abstract as possible. Such an exercise immediately helps to feel the difference between our true self and that weak resemblance that was in daily captivity in thoughts. A visual analogy can also be drawn: correct thinking is when you are the coach at the edge of the court, and thoughts are the players. You see the whole game and control each player. In the absence of conscious thinking, you feel at best one of the players, and at worst - their ball or puck. As one famous phrase says, the real discovery is not the search for new territories, but the ability to look at your land in a new way. In addition to uncontrollable thoughts, our daily habits hinder an open view of our own life. Habits are beneficial in many cases, for example, we do not need to re-learn bow on laces every morning - everything happens on autopilot. But when there are too many automatic actions, problems can arise.