Some tricks from books on psychology that can come in handy in life. How to ask, give compliments, win over people?
The story goes that Benjamin Franklin once wanted to conquer a man who didn't love him. This man was looking for a rare book that Franklin had. Benjamin found out about this and lent him this rare book, and when it returned to the owner, Benjamin simply thanked him. As a result, they became best friends. As Franklin said: "The one to whom you once did good, is ready to answer you with good much greater than yours …". This is just one of the techniques that are described in specialized books on psychology. But there are others.
Ask for more than you want
This effect is very simple and akin to bargaining in the market. The effect almost always works. You are obliged to overstate your requirements if a person needs you. At first, you will most likely be rejected. Do not resist, but give time. In 95% of cases, the person interested in you will respond again and offer a little less than you asked for, but at the same time it is guaranteed to be higher than you originally planned.
An imposed desire to help
Reception is very similar to the previous one. In order to awaken in a person an independent desire to help you, ask him once for something that he definitely will not do. Having received a refusal, you have created a person for yourself who considers himself obligated to you. Most likely, he will more than once independently turn to you with a desire to help, because inside he will have a feeling of guilt.
A person's name is like a magic sound
Dale Carnegie, author of How to Win Friends and Influence People, believes that using someone's name during a conversation is an incredibly powerful argument. The name of a person is the most pleasant sound for him. By pronouncing his name in a positive context, you grow significantly in his eyes.
Flattery is everywhere
It is everywhere and always. To begin with, it is important to understand that flattery must look natural, otherwise it can do more harm than good. If you flatter someone who has high self-esteem, then you are more likely to be lucky. Such people love themselves and love flattery, while they do not notice it. And those who have low self-esteem see a trick and deception in any positive assessments.
If you want to please a person - copy it. People with this skill are considered chameleons in society, from the outside it is noticeable how they are constantly changing and adapting to each individually. However, this skill needs to be developed at least a little in order to attract the people you want.
The work of parodist actors is based on this principle. All the celebrities who have been parodied from TV screens are often good friends of these actors.
Ask for mercy from the tired
When someone is tired, they are more receptive to all requests. The reason for this is that a tired person gets tired not only physically, but also mentally. If the boss is tired, then it is easy for him to allow you to finish it tomorrow, but you must complete it without fail and with high quality. This will give you a little respect in the boss's eyes. After all, you have kept your word.
Start asking for little things
It's simple, ask for a little at the beginning, and you will be given a credit of trust. By this principle, people become dependent on social movements. For example, at first you are asked to support the action against deforestation, you support, then again and again. A trifle, but you are ready to give more. You are ready to support the action against deforestation in faraway Tanzania or join the Green Party and contribute.
Don't Correct People When They Are Wrong
Carnegie also wrote in his famous book that it is not worth poking your nose into an obvious human error immediately after you find it. If you want to change a person's point of view, then approach this carefully. Even if you are a loser who blames anyone but himself for his troubles, you should not shout in the face. Agree with him at the moment and gradually try to change his point of view. Otherwise, you risk becoming enemy number one.
Repeat phrases and expressions of the right people
This principle is akin to the principle of "chameleon", when a person with facial expressions and gestures repeats the person in communication with whom he is interested. Words can please the ear if they sound like an echo. It is necessary to pronounce what the person has already said, what he heard inside his head.
Scientists have found that when people nod while listening to someone, they are more likely to agree with him. They also found that when someone nods in front of him, the person repeats like a parrot. Thus, the nod stimulates the listener's agreement. Everything is based on our favorite principle of imitation …