Good dad for every son
Good dad for every son
Anonim

Good Dad and Best Dad. We have found the best dad in the world on the Internet and we are in a hurry to share his entertaining notes with our readers.

November 22nd, 2009

We rode today with the little men on the attractions in the Lianozovsky Park. Believe it or not, Melky is allowed on adult rides! Small - a naive soul, instead of going straight to the landing with an impudent muzzle, he crumples with a ticket in his hand at the controller and asks in a trembling voice: "Will they let me in?" - they let him in. He's already big. Five and a half is not five for you. Strict controllers do not even ask how old Small is and whether he has reached a height of 1 meter 40 centimeters. They just ask where the parents are. “Yes, dad is standing there,” and they let Melky go.

And then the Old One somehow uncertainly says: “Pa, give me your word that you won't let us into this attraction anymore. Because he gets up sideways."

Little men grow up. Growing up. And these are just rides, right?

November 24th, 2009

I come to an important event. Serious and respectable people are sitting around. I take out my laptop bag and open it. On top of the laptop are two plastic tanks and a dozen soldiers. Serious and respectable people look at me with understanding.

Dialogues. About the meaning of life and piglets …

Offended me on Sunday Old. Strongly offended. I swore at him for a long time. And today he calls:

In general, my daughter Seraphima has a birthday soon. She is one year old. Friends write letters and ask what to give. A friend was going to donate paints that can be used to paint on the tiles in the bathroom. Then wash off and paint again. "Why?" I asked. "What why?" - the friend was surprised. “Why paint on the tiles in the bathroom? Are there really no other places? " For me, painting in the bathroom is like reading or smoking in the toilet. Artistic truth

- Pa, forgive me, please …

How to raise a man?
How to raise a man?
Children's question.

- Wow - you, - answers Small, - Great! Why didn't he call me?

The lessons of the fathers. 111 fatherly advice from dad
The lessons of the fathers. 111 fatherly advice from dad
April 12th, 2010

I took Melky away from his school preparation lessons. A small brother who already knows from his brother's experience that they are strictly exacted for shortcomings in their studies, and that an offensive is the best form of defense, immediately says to me in a reproachful tone: “Well, that's why you took me with you to the sea. The teacher told me that I missed a lot and fell behind and wrote swear words!"

How to raise a man?
How to raise a man?

- Nothing. You will catch up. But what a black one! What did the teacher write?

“I don’t know how to read in writing yet,” Melky answers sadly.

- Well, it doesn't matter. Let's figure it out.

We come home, look at the assignment, and there it is written in big written letters in red: “Good! Well done!"

That's how we live…

April 12th, 2010

They do not want to enroll Petty in the first grade this year. "Still small," they say. He is played in the classroom … February …

And for some reason I am sad …

April 19th, 2010

I am happy when I see Stary to school. For some reason it is easy and pleasant for me - we go, talk quietly about life and listen to the children's radio.

April 29th, 2010

I bought them for them once at their request of the soldiers. The little men were delighted, lying on the floor, playing. And then Old accidentally stepped on the soldier, he broke, and then dad stepped on, dad had a big leg and several of the soldiers broke. Petty was upset, and dad told him not to be bothered by Petty, but not to be sad, as dad will have a salary, so he will buy it.

The grandmother was warned that the dog was thoroughbred, with a difficult character. You cannot shout at Venya, you cannot punish and educate him, otherwise he will be offended, will suffer and can, what good, do himself a hara-kiri. Mom smiled unkindly … She did everything possible for Venya to act like a real Japanese: poke his nose into the poop on the rug, spanked him with a newspaper, shouted “fu, bastard, I said!”. But Venya fell in love with his mistress once and for all and happily licked her face as soon as his mother hesitated. Greenpeace

Petty calls me yesterday and asks:

How to raise a man?
How to raise a man?

- Pa, when do you have a vacation?

- From June 1, - I say, - there should be …

- Is it soon?

- Soon.

- After the day after tomorrow?

- No, - I say, - in a month. And what?

- Well, you promised to buy soldiers …

So I found out that Melky confuses two concepts: dad's salary and dad's vacation. He simply knows that both are good things.

That's how we live.

Melky came to his mother, clung to her and asks whom she loves more - him or her brother.

- Well, - the ex-wife answers, - I love you both. The same. Like two fingers. Which one do you like more?

- No, - says Small, - it's not according to the rules. According to the rules, you must answer unequivocally - either me or him. The rules are as follows. I installed them.

- No, - says the mother, - it's all the same the same. And your rules are wrong.

- Well, think about it, - the kid insists, - I went to you, and he went to dad.

- Like this?

- Well, I'm slender, and he's fat, my head is oval, and his head is round, like dad's …

- It's all the same, - the mother laughs, - it's the same. Lie down and go to sleep, baby …

This is just one of the stages of understanding the world. The baby is growing.

May 2nd, 2010

Small plays on the second floor on the computer in the strategy game Star Wars. From time to time he rolls down to me with an offer to see interesting things. Once again, rolling down, he suddenly asks:

- Pa, what is more than one hundred and fifty or two one zero?

Hyper-care of parents: advice from a psychologist
Hyper-care of parents: advice from a psychologist

Big numbers are so hard!

When I think how much less I gave the Little parental love than his brother, how much I gave it and never give it back, I feel very, very painful, nasty and ashamed. Especially when, asleep, Melky comes up to me, presses himself against my leg and is silent, waits for me to pat him on the head … and smile.

If you know what I mean.

***

April 29th, 2011

The sly old beetle called the guests for tomorrow, saying to his mother that he had agreed with me, and for me that he had agreed with his mother … But it’s so good outside the city now! I’ll have to go for pizzas tomorrow morning, and then deliver the little robbers! Do not break the same buzz, just because the cunning beetle has twisted us around his finger! The girls will come again!

May 1st, 2011

What a lot of fun, having loaded five children into the back seat, to drive through the traffic police post … little men hide their heads, laugh, fiddle and kick me through the seat … the traffic cops pretend not to see ….

May 6th, 2011

I'm not a kid anymore!

There is something very touching and painful when Melky stands on tiptoe on the height meter in order to reach the 140 cm bar, after which people are allowed on the scary ride "Cobra" …

Strict controllers do not let Melkoy on the scary attraction "Cobra": ((((. They say you still need to grow up …

They say: "Even if you stand on tiptoe, you still cannot reach the height meter bar!"

But we rode the Ferris wheel. 73 meters! Eh, it's good to skip school!

May 8th, 2011

The fact that Old is no longer a boy, but a youth, is best seen on the 73-meter-high Ferris wheel at VDNKh. Two years ago, he admired my beloved city, gaspingly saying that the people below are like ants. Now he even himself does not understand what he found so magical in this Ferris wheel in comparison with the Room of Fear and a 5D cinema. And he looks down on his younger brother, with a bird's-eye view sincerely delighted … And they especially like the swear words written in a black felt-tip pen on an iron structure at a height of seventy meters …..

The lessons of the fathers. 111 fatherly advice from dad
The lessons of the fathers. 111 fatherly advice from dad

The ripening of men …

May 12th, 2011

05:07 am

How strange - they went on May 9 to congratulate their grandfather on the Victory, and the little men received gifts!

12:01 am

I say to the Old:

- If you want to win a woman's heart, invite the girl to the opera (spending at my expense is a sacred thing).

“I don’t really need it,” Old replies grimly.

- As you know. But, I remind, not all girls are the same. And some of them make the heart beat faster.

Old does not answer, looks at me gloomily and mutters something under his breath …

That's how we live

May 13th, 2011

A very funny sight - the little men in the hairdresser!

May 14th, 2011

Stary has such a year-round assignment - to keep a "Reader's Diary". There you need to write down your impressions of your favorite books. Last time Old wrote about the Little Prince - and everyone was happy: I, the kind-hearted teacher Galina Yurievna, who received the presidential grant, and Old himself.

This time he described the most interesting thick book he had ever read - from the Star Wars series under the dreadful title of Solo's Revenge. Considering that a good half of the Readers 'Diary is devoted to the tactics of the Rebel cruisers in the Battle of Yavin, I have vague doubts about the high assessment of this part of the Readers' Diary. Old himself walks very pleased and asks my opinion if he needs to decorate the Reader's Diary with a picture of an Imperial Invincible-class Star Destroyer. I said that it is not necessary.

How to raise a man?
How to raise a man?

That's how we live. Then we read …

May 18th, 2011

So interesting - yesterday Old my favorite poems confidentially read - Blok, Balmont, and also a poem, as I understand it, by A. Makarevich "Snow". It is close to him…. Only sometimes I got lost, and I had to start first. Dad is a good listener of his favorite poems, not like a brother, who just about hedgehogs and iambic!

May 24th, 2011

And Old Blok and Balmont's poems read to me with expression and kept asking which poet is more important - Blok or Balmont. Blok, - I answer gloomily, but I refuse further discussions about Russian poetry. And for the simple-minded Melky, for now, if only iambic and trochee, if only trochee and iambic. He is a simple soul - he still does not understand tricycle dimensions …

That's how we live…

May 26th, 2011

From now on, Melky has an orange belt in karate! I suppose you don't have any belt, but Melkoy has a whole orange one. Now he can build any little thing in yellow belts. I'm not even talking about whites….

Tomorrow we'll go buy the belt itself …

The text is published with the preservation of the author's style and spelling. You can follow the new notes of the best dad in his "Live Journal" szg3.livejournal.com "Private Correspondent"

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